Childhood....

I have been reading a friends blog about childhood and a book on motherhood at the same time this week. I have also struggled with watching my husband deal with losing an uncle and am still struggling with the fact that I may soon loose an aunt. I started thinking about life and my own childhood and the memories came flooding back.....the year my mom coached my softball team, laying next to my dog Rockie and watching him die, building a girl scout float with my dad, "driving" on my Uncle Charlie's lap, making mud pies with my cousins, doing cherry-drops, laying on the driveway at Aunt Diane's eating Popsicles, Grandma's blackberry jam and biscuits, my Aunt crying the day Conway Twitty died, running over Wendy with the lawnmower (for fun, no one got hurt!), riding bikes, my mom teaching me to sew, the way my Aunt Shirley's house always smelled, playing on the slip-n-slide, watching "Double Dare," my mom leaving, my dad taking me to buy new clothes when mom left, Candy's mom taking me out for dinner on my birthday the year my mom left, painting the locker rooms the day mom left, Chantry telling me his Mom and Dad were getting a divorce too (instead his mom got cancer and died), Dad drinking, fighting with my mom, Dad picking me up from the movies drunk, growing-up at 15.... It was during this "flood" of memories that I realized for the first time that my childhood doesn't play like a movie, more like a slide show. I don't remember many family dinners, just that they were always there, or what our daily routine was, only that we had one until we didn't. I just remember moments, the good and the bad. That made me think about the "moments" I would like my children to remember. What would they be? What did I WANT them to be?
I decided to work hard to create those moments and enjoy them. This weekend it took me 3 hours to plant flowers I could have done in 30 minutes last year. Jenna and I got out her new water table and all the potting stuff and had a ball. We planted flowers, played in the water, danced on the back porch, and she only ate one mouthful of dirt! Then today an equally rewarding (and a bit scary) moment. Brady was brought into my class, crying and bleeding. Another student had hit him in the side of the head with a rock. With in minutes, he had a knot the size of a golf ball. I held him until he calmed down and called my sister to come and take him to the doctor. We sat in my desk chair and talked and I held ice on his head until my sister got there. I realized it didn't really matter what happened today, he probably won't even remember it. BUT, I bet he remembers later on that when he needed us, his mom and I were there. It was then and there that I gave up the idea of being Supermom and decided to just be a super mom. I may not ever win mom of the year or teacher of the year for that matter but, I am going to live each day to it's fullest, enjoy the gift God has given me in all of my children (born to me and not born to me). I am going to stop sweating the small stuff (or at least not sweat it so much). I may not look like those made for TV Mom's with their Better Homes and Gardens houses BUT, I am doing the best I can with what God gave me and I know that in the end that will be enough. I now have a 2 new motto's-My house is clean enough to be healthy and messy enough to be happy! AND We may not have it all together but together we have it all!